This was in the early days of games that included this much voice acting… and it really, really shows. 6 – Fatal Fury Special (Neo Geo/Arcade) • Tung Fu Rue brings us one of the greatest win quotes ever to be seen in a fighting game to Fatal Fury Special. • “Your fists of evil are about meet my steel wall of niceness.” • Is that a threat? Because a steel wall of niceness really doesn’t sound all that imposing. What does he do in battle with the steel wall of niceness? 5 – Exciting Hour (Arcade) • Just the name “Exciting Hour” is pretty close to a poor translation to start with. You wouldn’t know it from the title, but this is actually a pro wrestling game. •
Now, for a game called “Exciting Hour,” the translation is mostly inoffensive, except for one fighter – the “Insane Worrier.” • It doesn’t take much to figure out this is supposed to be “Insane WARRIOR,” perhaps an homage to the Ultimate Warrior. • But what it SAYS is “Insane Worrier,” which sounds more like someone’s clingy mom that a beefy pro wrestler. 4 – DoDonPachi (Arcade) • Two thirds of DoDonPachi’s copyright warning is totally fine. • The last sentence reads like it was written by a completely different person. • “Violator and subject to severe penalties and will be prosecuted to the full extent of the… JAM?” • This game is 10 years too early to be making Space Jam memes. 3 – Ghosts n’ Goblins (NES) • Ghosts n’ Goblins is hands-down one of the toughest games on the NES, due in no small part to the fact that you have to play it twice to finish it once. • But supposing you actually have the will and the patience to sit down and do that, you’re rewarded with this. • “Congraturation. This story is happy end. Thank you. • Worth it? 2 – Pro Wrestling (NES) •
Pro Wrestling for the NES features a mistranslation so classic and so well known, the very words have become a meme that works as shorthand for any mistranslated game. • “A Winner Is You.” • Those are words you’ve probably heard dozens of times before. Now you know the context. It’s Pro Wrestling on the NES tells you that you are, in fact, a winner. 1 – X-Men (Arcade) • The X-Men arcade game lives on in the hearts of many as one of the most memorable arcade beat-em-ups of the 1990s. • Part of that might be the rare 6-player co-op play. It might be that the X-Men cartoon was really big at the time. • Or it might be this infamous four-word phrase. “X-Men! Welcome to die!” • This is arguably still the greatest line Magneto has ever had in any X-Men property.